Sunday, May 20, 2012

Hello there.

Sorry for the absence.  We've been pretty busy and 110% of my attention has been at home these past few weeks.

We have moved...twice, since I last posted!  April 30th was the last day of Boeing's lease for our apartment.  We packed up the few boxes of belongings that we had with us, and moved into one of those corporate apartments that's basically like a hotel, but you have sort of a kitchen in your room (the only thing we didn't have was an oven).  Even had dishes.

They were out of rooms with two queen beds, so we ended up with one king and a fold-out sofa.  In a pretty standard size hotel room.  As Daniel put it, "We're going to get to know each other really well!"

I'm embarrassed to say that we didn't really have a plan in mind.  We knew that on May 3rd, we would be released from our short sale contract on the Lake Stevens house.  For the last month or so we had been regularly hassling the other realtor (the seller's) for updates from the bank, and each time it was "seven to ten more days" or on a few separate occasions "just one or two more days" and once even "just seventy-two hours and you'll have an answer"...with no answer coming in that time.  So, for several weeks we had been frantically house-hunting with our realtor, trying to come up with back-up options...and each of them dead-ending for one reason or another.

By the time we were moving into the hotel, we were resigned to looking at apartments or houses for rent, instead.  Something we could move into immediately was our first priority.

Thankfully, Hollie loves being in hotels.  Even now that we're settled, she's been asking to go back.

Despite that, the worst part about this whole thing has been how much it's stressing Hollie out.  She hasn't known up from down lately.  I have tried to maintain some normalcy by not letting go of my expectations - for her behavior toward Blake, no jumping on the bed (only bouncing on your knees - this has been my rule since she could jump at all!), keep food at the table, I won't make you three different lunches, etc etc etc.  This met resistance, or even a just a deaf ear.

I got the girls out of the rooms every possible minute.  Sometimes it was just to walk around the hotel (they had a wonderful enclosed outdoor area, and we enjoyed some sunny weather almost every day).  Otherwise we'd get out for the whole day to run errands, visit friends (who were former Wichita neighbors in the area on temporary Spirit business [sound familiar?] whom we hadn't known until now!), go to parks.  A lot of times I just asked Hollie for suggestions, and that's what we did (within reason - unfortunately we did not go visit Juliet and Levi).  We went to the beach and got fish and chips from the walk-up counter and had a great time.  Being on the beach, running back and forth from the towel to the (albeit, icy) water is good medicine.  The mood was lifted.  I hoped that we'd settle easily back into the rules and structure I'd been holding onto.  Not so.  Every time we came "home", after a minute you'd have thought we'd been cooped up in that room all day.  My next thought (and probably yours too) was that I was overdoing it.  Too much out and about, coming and going.  I started asking Hollie about some things we could do in the room for fun.  I suggested painting, and as I expected, she lit up at that idea.  After a quick trip to Hobby Lobby, I spread newspaper on the bed, and let her have at it.  She had picked out a little wooden cat to paint (I'm going to make it a Christmas ornament).

We took it easy.  Even watched a little TV.  Ate dinner outside.  Swam in the indoor pool.

That didn't help much either.  She was just stressed.  I think she ended up in bed with us every single night, and a few nights that week (and still now), even after getting in our bed, she would wake up crying, inconsolably.  Unable to indicate, at all, what was wrong.  I had to take her out into the hall.  I'm sure it was one of those too-tired-to-fall-back-asleep things, and going out into the brightly lit hallway didn't help, and she probably just needed about two minutes to vent her frustrations on my shoulder and then gone back to sleep, but Blake would have woken up after about one minute and then nobody would be sleeping.

So, the tension was there.  The what are we doing here????!!!!!  We were looking for rentals but not doing any better than we had been before.  There was major competition, and it made sense - it's so hard to buy a good house (everything is a short sale, super expensive, or needing renovation even to be livable) that everyone is wanting to rent.  Every rental that we called on was already taken.  Finally, on Friday night (the 4th) (the day after we were released from the purchase contract) we came across a condo for rent online.  It was in a great area, in our price range, great square footage, 3 beds/2.5 baths, attached garage, and the pictures looked great.

We thought, of course it's already rented, but first thing Saturday morning, we called.  We talked to the agent who told us, basically - yes, it is available, but there is another family who is very interested.  I'm showing it to them this afternoon, and I can show it to you, too.  I'm stuck in the office all morning, so it can't be any earlier.  If you want to, you can stop by my office ASAP and leave the application and deposit, and you'll essentially have first dibs."  Yep, without seeing it.  It was a risk, but a no-brainer - we're doing this.   

We jumped in the car without showering and hauled it to the agent's office, with an unshakable fear that the other family was on their way at that moment, too.  Of course, they weren't.  They were waiting to see it first. like normal people.  I felt bad that we were sort of "cutting in line", but really, we did what we had to do.  The agent was really nice.  She sympathized with our circumstances, and even told us, "You wouldn't believe how many people I get who are in exactly the same situation as you, and staying in a hotel."  Crazy.

Later that afternoon we saw the condo, and loved it.  All carpet except wood in the kitchen and dining room - and if you've ever had kids and a carpeted dining room, you know why I loved that part.  Good sized rooms, plus the washer and dryer, all on the same floor!  Second and third favorite parts, right there.

On Wednesday (the 9th) we got the keys and moved in.  While we were absolutely ecstatic to finally be in our own place, we were significantly worse off than at the hotel, sitting on the floor in an empty house with our two suitcases of clothes and a few boxes of toys and books, a very active baby and no gates for the stairs.

First order of business, gates for the stairs.  Second, Ikea.  In a late Wednesday evening trip across Seattle that ended in a mad dash for the last few items as they announced that the store was closing, we left with a fold-out sofa bed (something that we'd been thinking about getting anyway if the new place had a third bedroom for a guestroom/office), a new chair for Hollie (from the "as-is" section), a pot, a skillet, and some cooking utensils.

Simple living, man.  We were so so so happy to have a place that it didn't matter.  We set the delivery date for our furniture and stuff for the 16th (one week later, the earliest they could do), and were very much aware that that was when things would really get crazy, so we held onto our take-it-easy, keep-the-mood-light mentality.  It was a nice week - we went for walks and explored the area, and settled in as much as we could.

Things with Hollie improved, just barely.  Nights were still bad, but the days we getting better.

I should tell you about Blake.  She is one resilient kiddo!  She is a little needier (clingier, maybe?) than Hollie at this age, but she always has been.  Through all of this, she has been a happy girl.  Happy to get outside, happy to stay in.  More than anything, I just feel awful that she hasn't had the same benefit of a routine that Hollie had.  She's had naps in the car much too often.  Without a high chair, I've been holding her in my lap to feed her.  When I didn't have to time or spare attention for that (again, too often), it was pita bread or something else that she could eat on her own, on the floor.  Not as balanced a diet as I would like for her, and she had zero opportunity to practice using the spoon, something I think she was definitely ready for.  Thankfully, she loves her veggies, when she gets them.  Peas and carrots are favorites, but sweet potato, broccoli, and zucchini are up there on the list.  Meats, yogurt, and cheese also get gobbled up.  She LOVES her solid foods!  Except fruits.  I keep trying bananas, but she keeps snubbing them.  A baby not liking bananas just doesn't make sense to me!  Even ripe, soft pear was a fail.  Weird.

She sure is strong!  Pulling up and cruising are favorite activities, and she pushes Hollie around on occasion.  That's another story.  It was always a predicament, when Blake did things that Hollie shouldn't do - pull hair, bite (or rather, gum*), or wrestle roughly - and didn't get in trouble because it was just too cute!  Hollie definitely started picking up those habits, and became really frustrated when she got in trouble for taking toys away from Blake, but Blake didn't when she did the same.  I guess it's something every parent has to learn when they have a second child - I had to enforce the same rules for Blake, even if she can't understand yet.  It has really helped.  Hollie feels validated, and things feel more balanced.  It really makes sense.

*Update: that first tooth, the right lower incisor, finally came in on the 18th!  I'm going to miss her gnawing on my nose - that's definitely not happening anymore! :(

So, four days ago our truckload of stuff was delivered.  Oh boy.  The stuff.  We are sorting through it slowly but surely, one box at a time.  The girls are having a surprisingly good time with the process, and it is so so good to have our own beds, our own couch, my favorite wood cutting boards, all the little things that we planned on going without for a month, that turned into two and a half months, which felt like years.

I'm going to cut myself off here.  Congratulations, you made it!                        

Overall, I'm proud of us.  It was a situation we hadn't planned for (but should have), and there were some tense moments, but we held together and things didn't fall to pieces (not entirely).  We did our best to keep things light - dinner outside at the hotel, playing Scrabble while Blake sat in a high chair chewing on pita bread and watching Hollie run laps to her heart's content.  It will certainly be some time before things feel normal again, but I'm confident that with patience, hugs and kisses, all our good familiar things, this great place, and a one-year lease with our name on it, we can wait it out.                        

1 comment:

  1. Such a great update! I bet you are looking forward to a little break when you head to AZ!

    ReplyDelete